What a week!

So after the challenge (and all that vertigo), I was unable to make my way to work.  I was out the entire week!  It took a full 7 days before I was able to lay down past 45 degrees.  I was glued to my anti-dizziness, anti-nausea meds every 8 hours.  I was stumbling around my house and couldn’t even stand in the shower or wash my hair (ew!).  I left the house twice the whole week and I’m not even sure that was the appropriate decision. 

This week’s been better.  Sunday was the first day not needing drugs, and Monday saw me back at work.  I’ve had a couple moments of positional dizziness while there, but mostly it went well!  It felt so good to be back with people again.

This weekend my plan is to try out the ol’ yoga again and see how it goes.  I admit there’s quite a bit of anxiety sitting in my chest.  I don’t really trust my brain and body just yet.  But I’ll just set up in the back and rock my practice quietly.  I’ll break the seal and it’ll be okay. 

 

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Day 10: The Shit Show

I took good care of myself after my doubles.  Drank my electrolytes, ate good food, got rest.  I had planned to hit the 2pm class on Sunday to finish up my challenge.  We had a visiting teacher who was supposed to be awesome, so I was feeling excited.  I got up at around 10am, and by 11 had a delicious salad with a tuna steak along with a banana and peanut butter.  At around 1pm I realized I wasn’t quite feeling myself.  I just felt funny in my head.  I decided I’d lay down for a couple hours and hit the 4pm class instead.

Got up, still felt funny, but told myself I’d just take it easy.  Got to class, then laid down on my mat for a bit, then got crazy dizzy with nystagmus.  I made my way up to check in with the teacher and we agreed to take it easy on me.

I couldn’t even do the first breathing exercise.  I tipped my head back and lost my balance.  Sat that out.  Made it through the second set.  Made it through most of the standing series, though I felt out of triangle dizzy.  Things got pretty bad when I rolled over for Cobra.  Did the first set, rested, then when I went to push up for the second set everything went to hell.  My eyes were rapidly going side to side and I couldn’t feel myself on the floor, everything was spinning – it was awful.  The teacher noticed immediately and told me to lie on my back, but I couldn’t even roll myself back over.  I crawled out of the room (lucky for me, I’d set up near the door) with the teacher yelling behind me to stay where she could see me. 

I made it to the other side of the door and sat on my knees, holding on to a bench for dear life, bawling my eyes out and trying not to throw up.  I sat there unable to move my body an inch until the spine strengthening series was over.  At some point I fell over on to my back.  Someone else came out to rest and offered to grab me a coconut water.  I let her.  I sat up to take a sip and then everything fell apart.  I got up and hobbled to the bathroom where I proceeded to throw my guts up.  The kind of vomiting were your feet come up off the floor. 

So embarrassing.  Especially since I make roaring dinosaur noises when I throw up.  If ya’ll heard dinosaur noises on the wind Sunday… that was probably me.  You’re welcome.

I fled the building as soon as class was over and I could grab my things.  I did not thank the teacher, I just wanted to get to my home.  I got to my car and couldn’t do much else.  My legs felt weird.  They felt tingly and full like they were on the verge of cramping but couldn’t make up their minds.  I just sat there sweating in my soaked clothes – I couldn’t even change. 

After about 30 minutes I texted the studio owner (who was inside with the visiting teacher) and told her I felt weird, was still in the parking lot, and to apologize to the visiting teacher for me.  She came out with a bottle of vitamin water and got in my embarrassingly messy car to sit with me.  I cried some more while she said wonderful and soothing things to me. 

I drove very slowly and safely home (about 0.8mi) and by the time I got upstairs the dizziness was in full swing and the vomiting began again.  I was SO. SICK.  It was hours before I knew what to do.  I sat on the floor of the bathroom while the sun set – unable to get up or really move at all.  Luckily I had my phone so I started texting people to see if someone could take me to the doctor.  I finally decided I’d have to call an ambulance, so I texted my downstairs neighbor/landlord who offered to take me.  Once she saw me, though, she said she’d prefer to call an ambulance.  So we did.  And it was embarrassing. 

We went to the hospital where I was diagnosed with vertigo (plus my glucose was really high, so I got some insulin for that).  Got a couple liters of fluids, some meds for nausea and for vertigo, then hung out there until I could make my way home.  Once I got home, of course, the vomiting started up again.  UGH!

Monday saw me feeling much better, though, so I’m on the mend.  Today I went to see an Ear/Nose/Throat doc who said it was all likely caused by viral labyrinthitis (which is a cool name, eh?).  Basically my inner ear has been damaged by the virus and I have to wait for my central nervous system to catch up and figure out the new signals.  It’s annoying and unfortunate. 

A couple years ago I had a day-long episode of dizziness and vomiting (with no nystagmus) and about a month ago I had an episode of dizziness with nystagmus (but no vomiting).  I’m hoping this is not something I have to keep dealing with.  It causes some pretty awful days!

So.  I’m home and trying to rest.  I’ve got some meds to help, though I still can’t lay flat or roll over either direction.  I have to sit up to sleep which isn’t all that comfortable.  I’m tired.

But you know what?  I finished my challenge and got my damned t-shirt! 

Silver linings, people. 

 

Double Day!

I am so tired.  I don’t even know how it’s possible that I’m still awake at midnight.  This post is going to be lame and boring. 

My muscles are pissed, but I don’t think that’s because of the two classes.  I think it’s the daily yoga. 

Anyway.  I got up at 6 and made it to the 7:30am class.  I was sleepy and yawning throughout.  The room was packed and fairly juicy.  I was feeling a little nervous about the double thing, but then talked myself out of those feelings since it was only the first class of the day.  Class was pretty good!  Got a call out on my standing bow.  That’s always nice.  Especially since it’s always some miracle that I am able to hold it.  What I’ve discovered from this challenge is that I’m really starting to kick UP instead of just BACK.  Which means I’m feeling it in my hips.  I have become very aware of my hips.

I went home, showered, made some eggs with sauteed veggies and some toast.  Okay, fine, I made bacon too.  Went to the grocery store, then came home for a nap.  Then came the 4pm class.  I noticed a few things – in the first breathing exercise my elbows were coming up MUCH higher than before.  I thought they’d never be able to come up that high.  The 2nd part of Awkward is getting easier.  I’m finding the balance right away.  That’s kind of awesome.  My butt is staying towards my heels better in Half Tortoise.  All good things.

On my way to the 2nd class I started panicking.  It got worse once I was in the room waiting for class to begin.  I kept wondering how I was ever going to handle another ninety minutes.  I tried remembering what you’ve all said – to just take it one class, one posture at a time.  That helped.  And honestly, when class was over I realized it wasn’t that bad.  It wasn’t that bad!  I’m exhausted and pretty painful in my back, but that’s okay.  It was an accomplishment. 

One more class to get through tomorrow, then I get my t-shirt.  YES!

Still Going

This challenge is intense!  And honestly, this is less about the yoga itself and more about the commitment to myself and getting out of work on time.  So far so good. 

Tuesday night we had a visiting teacher (we’re having lots of those due to the studio’s festivities this week).  She was great!  It’s so nice to have different voices and perspectives in the room, even if the dialogue is always the same.  It was a good time. 

I missed Wednesday night because I’d already had plans but Thursday’s class was pretty great.  Standing series was better than floor – floor was killing my back. 

Tonight’s class though?  Amazing.  It was amazing.  While the pain in my back causes me to yelp out in pain occasionally, I still felt good about what I was able to accomplish.  I felt positive and wonderful throughout the entire class.  After class the teacher led us in a 20 minute guided meditation (apparently it was Yoga Nidra, which is new to me).  It was super relaxing.  I was so relaxed that I felt disconnected from my body, as if (and this is going to sound woo-woo) there was no separation between the floor, the air, and me.  It was wonderfully weird.  I left feeling gooey and soft. 

Tomorrow is double day!  I’ll be hitting the 9:30 and 4:00.  I can do this. 

Day 4

I made it to class Saturday, and it was effing brutal.  I died a thousand deaths.  I’d been up since 5am (called in to work), then busted out for the noon class.  I don’t know what happened.  Wait, yes I do.  I was upset when I left work because I had to maintain the boundaries I set when I got called in – that I was leaving at 11 to get to class.  I was asked to stay past 11 and had to say no.  Then I spent my entire commute to class feeling angry, resentful, and guilty.  Was yoga a good enough reason?  Obviously it was, but I spent the drive berating myself which means I got to class all amped up.  By the time we got to Eagle, I thought I was going to throw up.  I remember standing still, heels and toes together, and breathing while everyone else was doing Eagle.  I kept telling myself “I am doing Eagle right now.  This is the best Eagle I can do.”  That’s how the rest of the class went.  Plus, my back has been REALLY acting up lately, and I was having a lot of pain.  I followed class with a massage, which helped.

Sunday’s class was good.  I got up and went to the 9:30 (amazing) so I’d be out in time to hang with pals (we had pancake dinner – delicious!).  It was a decent class.  I came in feeling pretty creaky and halfway through class I realized I was feeling pretty good!  My body felt like it had give to it.  It was grand.

And today – I head to class in about 20 minutes.  I actually got out of work in time to make it, though I’ll be getting out a little late for my liking (9pm).  I turn into a pumpkin pretty early, so this class is going to cramp my style a bit, but so be it.  I AM GETTING THAT T-SHIRT!

I have pre-existing plans that will prevent me from making class on Wednesday, so I’m planning my very first double this weekend to make up for it.  EEK!  I think what I’ll do is go to the 9:30am and then the 4pm.  I’m planning to do nothing but yoga this weekend. 

Okay – going to get dressed.  Yay!

4/26/2013

My studio is having some events this week to celebrate its name change from Yoga Crossing to Bikram Yoga Waverley.  Our current studio owner, G, bought the studio about a year ago and decided to change the name to better reflect our Bikram-ocity.  New name, new gorgeous logo, and this week is the grand re-opening.  New swag, fundraiser for Boston 1, 10-day challenge, Free Yoga Day (tomorrow), lots of visiting teachers, and they’re ending it all next weekend with a PARTY. 

Today was the start of the 10-day challenge and I’m planning to do my very best to hit those 10 days.  If you make 7 days, you get a new BYW t-shirt, which is pretty rad. 

Tonight’s class was a treat.  We had a teacher I’ve never been with before – she teaches the 6:30am Tuesday class.  It was great!  Great to have a new voice in the room, great to have new thoughts and tips.  I loved it.  I was struggling in a lot of postures, but told myself that at the end of the ten days I would be MUCH better.  I just kept smiling.

Here is a picture of my badass new 40oz HydroFlask:

Image

Isn’t our new logo super pretty?  I don’t know who designed it, but I love it.

Hitting the noon tomorrow and probably an early class on Sunday.  I will likely do my first double on Saturday of next weekend since I have plans Wednesday night that will interfere with yoga.  Fingers crossed on that one.

Now for a hot bath. 

xo

Uggggghhhhhh.

Today’s class was awful.  Just awful.  I struggled through the whole thing

I didn’t sleep well last night after all the excitement and then woke up at 7am.  Decided I’d hit the 9:30 class.  I had some water and a banana with my brand new chia-espresso peanut butter (thanks Leigh!).  I was looking forward to class, assuming it would make me feel better.

There was a class at 7:30 and when I walked in, the heat and humidity just punched me in the face.  It was dreadful.  They worked on getting the room under control in the 30 minutes before class, but it was still super juicy.  I was sweating bullets from the moment we started, my back was spasming, and the weird nerve pain showed up in the OTHER leg.  What the hell???  It wasn’t anywhere near the level of pain from before, but it was there (I have a neurology appt tomorrow to get things checked out). 

It was one of those classes where all I could think about was when I was going to leave the room for a little break – you know the ones.  I was exhausted by Eagle and sat out both sets of that.  I got on my feet for the balancing series, but did not remember to bring any balance with me, so those sucked.  I got dizzy and sat out half of Triangle and half of the next pose. 

People, it was a shit show.  I was pouring sweat.  It was awful.

By the time Fixed Firm came around, I decided I would give the teacher as much of my energy as possible.  I did the rest of the floor poses, I tried to be super aware of the vibe and energy I was putting off (mainly because I realized that I was giving off shitty energy). 

I’ve never been so thankful for a class to end.  I realized throughout class that I was still feeling the nervous jitters that I was feeling yesterday.  They hadn’t gone away yet.  I brought them with me and they colored everything I did in that room.  Now, I haven’t had a shitty class in a very long time, so for that I’m grateful.  Just, damn.  Bad classes are so bad!

I’m about to throw down on two liters of water and then go to bed.  I’m physically and emotionally wiped.

xo