A Lull

I just haven’t felt like posting lately.  I can’t believe I haven’t written anything since the 18th.  I’ve been going to class, but then I come home with yoga brain and can’t put together a post.  Then the next day comes and the next class which just leaves me feeling emotionally overwhelmed (which has been The Theme of The Weekend).

I went back to work this past Monday, which means:  I’m pain free!  Not discomfort free, but the shooting pain down my leg is gone.  That shot was TOTALLY WORTH IT.  I’d planned to ease my way back in to work, and of course that backfired terribly.  I was there 2 and 3+ hours after my shift ended on a few days.  That sucked.  What that also means is that I didn’t get to yoga on ANY of my work days, which is still something I need to work on.

I’m really struggling right now.  Ya know, with my stuff.  My stuff is present and weighty on my shoulders these days.  I can rationalize that it’s because I was out of work for two weeks, in pain for a few months, and didn’t have anything to do but think — but that rationalization only helps so much.  So right now I’m hurting in my heart and in my head.

But yoga! So my backbends have gotten good (specifically Half Moon and Camel).  Whether or not they look good, they FEEL good.  I’ve often had a lot of trouble with the spoken directions.  I know I’ve been told for a long time to keep my chest up during those backbends, but I never understood how that was even possible, so I just ignored it.  But I happened upon a YouTube video of a lady demonstrating kapotasana and what it means to keep your chest up.  OMG, it’s helped SO MUCH.  Somehow, just from watching this video, my half moon (if I’m having a good day) just glides back… and back… and back.  Never past, like, 75-80 degrees, but still.  This is pretty rad after having had so many back issues lately.

Here are other things I’ve noticed and been surprised by:

  • Even after all this time, I still hate the first breathing exercise.  I know it’s good for me.  Don’t care.
  • My feet are solidly together for Half Moon.  Because I’m a big girl with big legs, this has been an issue.  But now my toes and heels are happily touching.  It feels natural now.
  • I no longer get feet cramps during Awkward.  I don’t even know when it stopped… they just don’t happen anymore and THANK GOD.
  • I’m getting some of the strength and stamina back in my hips.  Awesome.
  • I can now lift my left leg again for Standing Head to Knee and Tree.   Woo!
  • I still cannot reach both feet in floor Bow.  I know I could reach if someone else put my foot in my hands… I just can’t fling my fat little leg into my hand while holding the other fat little leg.  This is disappointing.

Here’s hoping I get to take more than one class this week!!!


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